Behaviors Are Separate From People

Children are people. Behaviors are behaviors. Getting the two confused can lead to having your child see himself or herself as a good or bad person. In fact they are children who do good and bad things. Even when they do things that are terribklly wrong know they are still your child and deserve love.
I raised my children while being a La Leche Leader back in the 1970s. We had a saying, "You can have spoiled vegetables but not spoiled children." I raised my kids with that truth foremost in my mind. My children grew up with boundaries and learned appropriate behaviors from the earliest age. I didn't always like what they did or didn't do and I always loved them just because they existed. And I made sure to hug them lots and tell them, "I love you" lots and lots.
Back in the 1970s we had bumper stickers that reead, "Have you hugged your kid today." Well, have you? virginia Satir created the Family Therapy movement. She told the world, "People need 4 hugs a day to survive, 8 to get by and 12 to thrive."